So I've been trying to bring myself to write down all that has been happening in these last two weeks with regard to my case petitioning the court for relocation, but I can't hide it...I am not okay. So let me start with a recap.
On September 22nd, I received the official letter offering me the job that was verbally offered to me approximately a week before hand. Of course I immediately provided that to my attorney who then gave a copy to both the court and to Mike's attorney. We already had a pre-trial scheduled for the following Tuesday so my attorney didn't think we needed to file a petition requesting an emergency hearing. I had genuine expectations that upon seeing the job offer, the amazing salary (literally almost quadruple my current income), and the projected start date, that the court would set a hearing date soon...very soon. I really expected that we would be in court sometime in October. The potential employer, who is aware of my situation, was willing to work with me to give me a little extra time to actually relocate, but we all thought it would be a matter of weeks.
Well, at the pretrial conference, even with the job offer, the judge set the court date for the end of December. He also made it known that after the court date, he would be gone for the rest of the month and then he also made it clear that he would be taking his time to make his decision. That means that at the VERY earliest, I couldn't make a move until at least mid-January and possibly more likely to be sometime in February. Of next year. As in five more months away. As in WAY past the projected start date and long after the date they wanted me to accept the amazing answer-to-prayers job offer.
I wasn't present at this second pretrial. We had both been at the first one, in person and in the court. The second one was scheduled to be a telephonic conference between the judge and two lawyers. So naturally, my first thought was well maybe the job offer wasn't really presented very strongly to the judge or maybe he hadn't read it closely. Surely if he saw the details outlined in the letter he would have set it for sooner. But regardless, here we were facing a hearing date at the end of the year. So, after initially panicking (literally) I tried to convey to my lawyer that this was a problem and I need the hearing moved up. He asked me to speak with the company and see what they said. Of course, as I already knew, they were as concerned as I was. The job I was offered was needed immediately. What to do?!
So...I again spoke with my lawyer and we decided to petition the court for an emergency hearing. My initial panic turned into hope again. Surely if the judge realizes what this job means for Brooke and for me he will move this up. I mean it had only been two weeks earlier when he had mentioned the possibility of an October date anyway. So, we started the process to request an emergency hearing and I was again hopeful.
Then a few short days later, I received a copy of the paperwork Mike's attorney filed objecting to my request for emergency hearing. It was very frustrating to read, let me tell you what. Some of the things they were saying were just hurtful. One of the claims, among others, was that I had made this decision and knew this move was coming a long time ago and I should have filed earlier and that this was essentially a predicament of my own making. Well, let me say for the record that this decision to pursue this move was NOT an easy one to make. A catalyst for sure was my cancer scare earlier this year. It was SO hard to go through that without daily support and being surrounded by family. But just because I had gone through a hard time without my family didn't mean it was right to just pick up and move. I weighed so many different factors and most importantly considered what was best for my Brookie. And once I made the actual decision, I immediately began looking into attorneys, hired my guy, and we filed the petition. There was no lag time, no time when I thought, hmm...now that I've finally decided, let me drag this out even longer please. Ummm...NO!
Anyway, that day was another day of panic. I mean wow, really?! So I spoke again with my lawyer, who was busy writing a brief to file with the court in support of our request for the emergency hearing, which was scheduled a few days later for a hearing to decide if I could have an emergency hearing (yes literally...this process seems so crazy to me!) I felt better after speaking with my lawyer. He assured me that he thought we had a valid reason to request the emergency hearing and he asked me questions so he could write a detailed brief. And the next day when I received a copy of his brief I felt relief. It was very compelling...or so I thought.
And that brings us to three days ago...last Friday - the day of the hearing on the request for emergency hearing. It was again going to be held via conference call and I had asked my attorney to be present. So I drove down to his office so I could sit in on the call. The call should have lasted ten minutes or so. Well, it turned out to be much longer than that. We start the call and my attorney reviews the facts that are bringing us to request the expedited hearing. Then Mike's attorney has his turn to talk and the guy talks forever. And of course he is vehemently objecting. He essentially accused me of trying to railroad the court into speeding the process up so that they wouldn't have sufficient time to prepare and therefore I would win. Hurtful and SO not true! He then tried to say this was basically a custody issue, which my attorney refuted and said that Mike has never expressed any interest in changing custody and Brooke will remain with me whether I get to go to Texas or not. He also tried to say that I was trying to guilt (yes he used that word) the court into granting me a temporary order to go down there now and then come back at the time of the hearing, which I guess is not allowed in order to provide stability for the child. Again, just SO not true! My attorney responded saying no, we are asking for an expedited final hearing so that I can accept this job offer.
Now whether or not the judge listened to anything that man had to say I have no idea. In retrospect, we think that he had made up his mind before the hearing was even held. When he started to speak after both sides had presented their cases, I literally couldn't breathe. But it was evident pretty quickly that this wasn't going to end in my favor. He denied my request for the emergency hearing. Essentially he said that we were asking for a prompt hearing and that in his opinion December was prompt enough. Wow...I was, am, absolutely crushed.
So, that brings us up to date. I am not okay. I am frustrated and discouraged. I am doing what I believe to be in the best interest of my daughter and I am not even getting a chance to present my case to the judge for several more months. And, the court, which wants me to have a job offer, won't help me to be in a position when I can either formally accept or decline the offer. So that puts me in a continued holding pattern. I feel so literally STUCK. I can't make plans here, but I can't make plans there either. My mom and I are trying to come up with a viable solution to help me preserve this job offer but we are literally looking at several more months in addition to the four months I have already spent waiting and wondering.
I don't even know how to end this except to say that I am devastated, frustrated! I know that what I am doing is right but I feel like I take a step forward and someone pushes me back. And it hurts.
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