Chapters

So I'm a pretty avid blog reader thanks to my amazing friend Shannon.  About nine months ago, when she directed me to several blogs that she was following, I'm sure neither of us realized just the kind of gift she was offering me.

One of the blogs that she recommended is one that I have been faithfully following ever since and it has been such an amazing blessing to me.  This absolutely spectacular gal Amy and her hubby have gone through their own hardships, particularly a battle with infertility, that just touches my heart.  And her faith, grace, love, and her ability to be candid through it all...well, she inspires me.  As they were recently going through their own very difficult and a very unfair situation with an amazing amount of grace, Amy wrote this:

From Chapters (http://www.dustyandamy.com)
"...Faith is not about everything turning out ok, faith is being ok no matter how things turn out...because you believe in something bigger.  Lord, I'm longing to see your desires revealed in me...take my heart, take my life, as a living sacrifice...all my dream, all my plans, Lord, I place them in your hands..."
Read the blog post in its entirety at http://www.dustyandamy.com/2011/10/when-rubber-meets-road.html

And oh boy did I - DO I - need to hear this, be reminded of this.  I recently said in a post and I have said to friends and family.  I am not okay.  And it's true...I'm not.  But, I fully believe that I will be.  God will touch my heart and lift this discouragement.  In fact, the truth is that even though I still cry at the drop of a hat and even though I get overwhelmed when I look at the road ahead of me and the frustrations surrounding me, He is still in my heart, whispering that He loves me and that He knows what is best.  He speaks to me through the words of good friends, through the lyrics of songs, and through other blog posts such as that one right up there.  You see, I'm not quite sure how to eloquently explain this.  My faith is not shaken.  I still believe.  My heart, well my heart is battered and beaten and my spirit is still a little bit crushed.  But I believe with all of my bruised heart that God will use this situation, no matter how difficult, for His good.  I'm still hoping and praying that when this road has been traveled and I'm on a new path, that new path will be one in Texas.  That hope isn't going to change.  I feel in my heart that is where I am supposed to be, where Brooke is supposed to be.

So I will keep trudging forward, heart in hands and full of faith.  And today, right now, I will thank God for the way that He uses others to encourage me in this journey.